Dear Officer Krupke,
I will admit, when you jumped out from your clever hiding spot behind that tree and stepped in front of my swiftly moving vehicle this morning, I thought I was a goner. Maybe your heart broke at the sight of my adorable little puppy on the passenger's seat. Or perhaps you were moved by my, "Oh, I am so sorry! Was I REALLY going that fast?! I-am-just-going-to-be-late-for-work-and-my-boss-is-a-little-nuts-and-I-need-to-drop-off-my-cute-little-doggie-here-and-did-I-mention-that-my-boss-is-a-narcissistic-spaz?" story.
Whatever the reason, Officer Krupke, I heart you.
I shall head my warning, to be sure!
With gratitute,
C. Erroneous
