Clearly Erroneous - The Blog!

Thursday, August 16, 2007

Law School 101

I served on an alumni panel yesterday for my JD alma mater's 1L Orientation. Looking around the auditorium, I could not help but think back to the day, five years ago, when I began my own law school odyssey.

There will likely be dozens of these same panels at the couple hundred or so law school orientations occurring over the next couple of weeks. If you are starting your 1L year, a couple of words of advice about Orientation:

1. People Are (& Are Not) What They Appear to Be... Case-in-point #1: There was an uber annoying woman during my 1L year that showed up on the first day in a chauffeured car, and tried to make friends by taking a group of people out to an expensive restaurant at the lunch break. She also pre-screened the 1L directory, and specifically sought out those of us that went to ivy-league schools to be in her study group (I pretended not to hear her when she approached me...). Anywho, turns out that not only was this woman psycho, but a pathological liar to boot (plus, she was not all that smart). She said that she was transferring to another school for her 2L year, however, good authority in the Dean's Office later told us otherwise. Case-in-point #2: A woman showed up to Orientation in a cheesy-Spencer-Gifts-t-shirt (e.g., "Mrs. Timberlake"), and I immediately thought, "Oh, God..." Turns out, five years later, she is one of my best friends from law school, and one of the brightest attorneys I know...

2. First Impressions Matter. It's not just about being professional at the activities that take place at the law school itself, but it's how you conduct yourself at the bar at night that can haunt you. Let's put it this way: I did not go out during Orientation, but I knew by 12pm the next day all about the woman in my section that had already hooked up with two other men from the other section... in the same night. Know this: Your reputation on day one is golden, but if you blemish it just once, your classmates will remember it for YEARS. Even if you are the Clarence Darrow of your class, people will remember you for your escapades, not your mind.

3. Hit the Books, But Not Too Hard. Get your first assignments done a couple days in advance, and go over them the night before. This will allow the readings to sink in for a day or so. Plus, you are likely to be a bit nervous the night before, and that is never good for retention. Don't show up the first day with the entire casebook tabbed; it's a marathon, hon', not a flashy sprint.

4. Faculty May Not Be What They Seem, Either... Just don't get high expectations. Not to be cynical, but that incredibly sweet professor that appears all perfect and inspiring and motherly may let you down in the end. Instead, seek out the professor that is kind but tough, the one who demands that you earn his/her respect but then, once you do, will bend over backwards to mentor you.

The kids in yesterday's audience seemed to think I was giving them some good advice, so I might add more as the year goes by...

Monday, August 13, 2007

Out of the Closet

Judge: So, what did you do this weekend?

Me: Well, Judge, I totally reorganized my closet.

Judge: Really... Well, you are a pretty organized person. I mean, it couldn't have taken that long to do, right?

Me: Au, contrare, Judge.

Closet before:

Closet after:

I rest my case.

Friday, August 10, 2007

My Moon is In the 7th House...

My horoscope for today (and yours, too, if you are a scorpio):

Follow all your whims today, and let spontaneity guide all your decision-making.


When Judge, however, asks how I reached my conclusion on case X later this morning, I am not going to let him in on this...

Thursday, August 9, 2007

Summer Headnotes

The three songs that have been stuck on continual repeat mode for the past week:

-Paralyzer, Finger Eleven
-Read My Mind, The Killers
-Lovestruck, JT

With the sun, the heat, my quasi-convertible, the Bose... I am a happy girl...

Wednesday, August 8, 2007

One L(egally Blonde)

The WSJ recently reported that "Legally Blonde" had become this generation's "Paper Chase". Okay, that's scary. One Ls should not put either their faith or reliance in any book or film to prepare them for their first year of law school. That said, I enjoyed "LB", and what's more, I loved the musical! Download the musical soundtrack. After all, I think that you'll need a playlist to get you through finals. It's fabulous. Everyone should have a law school moment a la "So Much Better." My personal favorite number from the show, "Chip on My Shoulder," offers this jem:

Guess she got a chip on her shoulder.
Maybe some wise man told her:
“With the chance we’ve been given,
We gotta be driven as hell!”
She was something to see there;
I’m just happy I could be there--
First big test and she aced it!
She’s so close she can taste it!
She gotta chip on her shoulder
Guess you never can tell…
With little Miss Woods comma Elle!

Tuesday, August 7, 2007

Dear New Clerk,

Just wanted to share a couple of things with you:

1. We all know about the highly inappropriate message you sent to our outgoing colleague in which you propositioned this person for a night in your company. News Flash: You're no Casanova, hon... While those of us who know about it are HIGHLY amused, we can't help but wonder what who the HELL you think you are. I mean, really. Look in the mirror. Um, 40? A little pudgy. Weird lispy thing going on. Uh-huh. Do you think that you have a snowball's chance in hell with a gorgeous younger person with an adorable, successful fiance?

2. Your panache for finding typos is a great skill, and we can't thank you enough for your attention to detail. We are so better for it.

That's all.


If I Knew You Were Comin'...

Let's say you are sucked in, as I was, to the uber-cuteness of the new Williams-Sonoma Bug Cakelet pan... Once you master the baking/decoration of the bug cakes, then what? I decided to make a bug-cake-diorama, so-to-speak. The bottom layer is a double-chocolate fudge brownie.
It was super yummy, too.
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